Man Who Laid It On Thick About Quitting Job Not Such Hot Shit During Pandemic

ALBUQUERQUE, NM—Noting the 37-year-old marketing professional was no longer so high and mighty, sources confirmed Monday that local man Andrew Martin, who laid it on really damn thick about quitting his job earlier this year, was not such hot shit during the pandemic. “Months and months of talk about how this place is going nowhere, but then Covid hits and boom—it’s suddenly not the time for the next chapter after all, huh?” said coworker Vanessa Bannerman, who noted she hadn’t heard so much as a peep from the man about moving on to greener pastures since February. “I guess he changed his mind about finding somewhere better where he could grow and thrive. Guess this organization isn’t so incompetent anymore, is it? It looks like you’re back in the dregs with the rest of us, pal. What a convenient time to find out you’re no longer stagnating.” At press time, Martin’s entire department had been laid off.

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